Initiation Week

The end is near. 

With less than 2 weeks left in the semester, classes are winding down and students are preparing for the holidays. Greek life, however, is at its peak. 

For many fraternities and sororities, the end of the semester also means the end of pledging. Hundred of eager rushees have now been weeded out into a select few, the next generation of active fraternity brothers and sorority sisters are now ready for initiation. 

Initiation is perhaps one of the most heavily guarded traditions of the entire Greek system. Each sorority and fraternity has their own method, their own rituals for inducting pledges, followed to a T year after year. 

Generally, though, initiation begins as a week of heightened "hazing" followed by that inglorious moment when it's all over. 

"No matter how big of a hard-ass you are, initiation might bring a tear to your eye. You've survived the hardest semester of your life; you deserve to show a little emotion."

Initiation is one of the best feelings of your life. It's the moment you've been anticipating since the start. After you've been through hell and back, you are finally worthy of sportin' those awesome Greek letters on your chest. So a huge congratulations to everybody crossing over into active-hood this week! Welcome to best four years of your life. 

While initiation is very symbolic to fraternities and sororities alike, I would like to point out that there are significant differences in initiation week for girls and guys. While guys may endure some of the most brutal and demeaning adventures preceding induction into the brotherhood (as depicted in the video below), sororities often engage in a series of nurturing, sisterly bonding activities prior to induction into the sisterhood. Both achieve the same goal, but through starkly different routes. 

In a final hurrah, fraternities embrace everything that embodies masculinity--aggression, homophobia, independence, strength, etc--in order to test their pledges' loyalty to the brotherhood. Initiation week is often the time when fraternities are caught for illegal activities such as hazing. Pledges are inducted into the fraternity at the end of a very long week, when the entire house, pledges and actives alike, have reached the limits of their exhaustion.

In contrast, sororities cultivate femininity during initiation week, inspiring their pledges through gifts and candlelight ceremonies that reiterate the demure and gentle nature expected of women. Come initiation day, pledges are donned in all white, another reference to virginity and monogamy. As a symbol of purity, it is at this moment that sorority pledges are graciously inducted into active-hood by the swift switch of their pledge pin for an active pin. 

I guess differences in initiation can be attributed to the differences between men and women. Women achieve equal status with each other by proving their dedication in a more mental form, whereas men attain status over one another and prove loyalty through physical force. Women are less likely to view physical training as an integral part of the bonding that creates sisterhood; men are less likely to take mental symbolism as seriously.  

"Father blames UCLA fraternity for son's death"

Last Saturday an eighteen-year-old man was found dead on a mattress at the UCLA Theta Chi fraternity house. Authorities say the victim, Glen Berlin Parrish, was under the heavy influence of alcohol and prescription medications which was most likely the cause of his death. Parrish's father is now attempting to place blame on the Theta Chi fraternity for negligence.

UCLA Theta Chi Fraternity

While I send my condolences to the young man who's life was tragically cut short, there is a larger issue at hand. Headlines in the Los Angeles Times, NBC, and Fox 11 News, all read along the lines of "Father blames UCLA fraternity for son's death." In an all too familiar scenario, Greek life is yet again implicated with 100% of the blame for misconduct.

First of all, Glen Berlin Parrish was neither a student at UCLA nor was he involved or with a fraternity on any college campus. His body was merely found at Theta Chi, upon where his father claims Parrish was visiting a friend for the weekend.  Therefore, he has no affiliation with the Greek system; there should be no reason to attribute the cause of his death to influences of the fraternity.

Secondly, Parrish was 18-years-old, which, in all fifty states of America means he is no longer a minor. He is an adult; he can make his own decisions and take full-responsibility for his actions. If Parrish was drinking and using drugs, he was well aware of the risks and consequences.

A quote from the LA Times: "Parrish's father said his son 'was really looking forward to' the Friday night party at the fraternity house." Mr. Glen Berlin Parrish knew exactly what he was getting into when he walked into Theta Chi come Friday evening. Fraternity houses are not known for classy, sober fun and parent-approved activities. Of course drugs and alcohol would be present at a party, but I am almost positive no one was forcing these down Parrish's throat.

The father claims that Parrish's friends should have alerted the paramedics, that they shouldn't have allowed him to drink alcohol or take drugs, and that fraternities should "have someone walking around checking on people at night."

The issue with these claims is that people like Mr. Parrish senior are making it more difficult for students to contact the proper authorities when underage drinking and often illegal substances are present. If the fraternity men were to alert the paramedics every time someone got a little too drunk at their house, there would undoubtedly be consequences for the frat such as social probation or termination of their chapter charter. In most cases, the inebriated folks that pass out at the frat house wake up fine (granted a little hungover) the next morning. How are Parrish's friends, who were most likely also intoxicated in more ways than one, expected to know that their friend was in grave danger?

Drugs and alcohol are a part of the college scene whether or not a fraternity house is the social setting. If you plan to participate, you have to be responsible for your own actions. Simple as that.

It's an unfortunate situation that Glen Berlin Parrish passed away, but his actions can't really be blamed on the fraternity.

A Big Fat Greek Engagement

A new phase of life has recently dawned on me--I am reaching that point in my life where my high school classmates are starting to get married. It's a scary concept, really, because my perception of married couples is still the image of my parents and the baby boomer generation. Yet many of my Generation Y peers are diving into serious relationships and thinking seriously about marriage.

The concept of marriage got me thinking about love, romance, and relationships are perceived differently by men and women. Most women will have fantasized about  their perfect wedding years before they've even hit puberty; most men cannot even fathom the concept of marriage until they are involved in a very serious relationship.

This gender dichotomy is further demonstrated by one of the oldest traditions in the Greek system--the lavaliering ceremony (sometimes also referred to as pinning). In a typical lavaliering ceremony, a brother gives his fraternity's Greek letters to his girlfriend, thereby symbolizing his commitment to her. This ritual often occurs between couples who are in very serious relationships and about to be engaged, a pre-engagement rite of passage. Sororities have a similar tradition that couples the lavaliering ceremony called the candle passing ceremony; sisters of the sorority house gather together and pass a lit candle around in a circle until the engaged girl blows the flame out. 

For sorority women, an engagement announcement is one of the happiest events of the year. As soon as the chapter president announces a candlelight ceremony, the whole house erupts into an excited buzz trying to guess the lucky girl that is now one step closer to attaining her dream wedding. A quick glance at wedding message boards confirms the idea that women are generally excited to get lavaliered; as one woman puts it,

"My (now) FI lavaliered me the end of my senior year. We had been dating since my sophomore year and I watched countless sisters get candle passes (some from guys who they hadn't been dating for nearly as long as we were dating at the time...) and I was obviously happy for my sisters, but secretly SO jealous!"

Marriage and engagement is perhaps the epitome of traditional femininity. When a woman commits herself to a man, she is thereby committing to a monogamous relationship and taking a more dependent role that will allow her to enter domestic sphere.

The Black Engagement Coffin

Conversely when a fraternity house gets wind of a lavaliering ceremony, brothers of the house band together to mercilessly haze the poor fool who fell in love. Some fraternities deliver their brother to his girlfriends doorstep in a black coffin, symbolizing his social death, other fraternities kidnap their brother and tie him naked to a tree for all to see. In this particular video aptly titled the "consequences" of lavaliering, a brother is dragged and then pushed into a pool after lettering his girlfriend.

Whereas lavaliering is seen as an accomplishment for women, the ceremony is seen as a suicide for men. By committing to one girl, men are forgoing their masculinity and forever giving up their promiscuity and independence.

It's interesting to think that the same ceremony could produce such polarized responses from the different genders. Do you think you would respond in a similar way if your friends got engaged?